Hello all... Well, it's my first time posting here although I've been keeping up with this thread for a while. I'm really grateful I found it because I've been on a massive spiral for the last four months or so.
I figure there's no harm in admitting what happened here. I lost a friend to an illness. And one of my other friends sent me a B*T*S interview which she said would cheer me up. B*T*S with puppies or something.
I, like many, fell under B*T*S' spell (I can't think of a better word for my experience). I'm ashamed to admit that I got insomnia from the sheer... craziness of it? Music videos, interviews, B*ngtan Bombs, Run episodes. I'd stay up till 4:00am on most days, blindly consuming the content. It turned me into a zombie without me even realising it.
But as time went on, I became more anxious. I couldn't put my finger on it and I kept having really strange dreams featuring scenes from their music videos. I was really ashamed about what was happening because I couldn't make sense of it and that was the scariest part. I couldn't talk to anyone about it because I'd be considered crazy or worse. Who could admit that a music group was causing them so much anxiety?
Everything changed when I found this thread. It made so much sense and helped me see things completely differently. So, if I contribute nothing else here, I just want to say thank you to all of you because you literally saved me.
Also, I'm now back to full nights of sleep and relatively dreamless sleep