look what I found...
R-E-S-P-E-C-T
By Dr. Lovegood
https://www.keirsey.com/personalityzone/lz49.asp
All people want respect, but men seem to crave it more than women. All people want love, but women tend to find it more critical than men. For there to be a successful relationship, both partners need to give each other respect and love. In this article and the next one, I'm going to look at showing respect to men and love to women. However, women want to be respected for the same things their male counterparts want respect for, and men want to be shown love in some of the same ways their female counterparts do. So both articles are useful for showing love and respect to both sexes.
Generally speaking, men want to be seen as providers and protectors. They want to be seen as taking good care of their families and as strong and able to protect their families from any evil. However, they focus on different areas depending upon their temperaments. This is a guide to offering respect in a way which is meaningful to your partner.
Guardian men hope to be respected for:
- Providing for their families on a financial level as well as fixing things and arranging for maintenance to keep things working
- Prudent planning for housing, career, investments, and retirement
- Being a valued member of a religious group, club, or social organization
- Remembering important days
- Keeping things organized and running smoothly
- Protecting their partners and children from evil company and influences
Artisan men need to be respected for:
- Providing romantic gestures, fancy gifts, and dinners together
- Their bodies - how they've made well-toned physical machines of themselves
- Their prowess in sports, strength, and, most importantly, the bedroom
- Courage and bravery with the long shot that paid off
- Their ability and willingness to adapt to almost any need or circumstance
- Protecting their families in the face of evil people and circumstances
Rational men want to be respected for:
- Providing freedom and treating their mates as rational adults
- Their expertise in their field(s) of interest
- Their ability to see long-term implications others can't and to respond to avoid negative consequences
- Their ability to deal with things in a logical, rational manner without being swayed by inappropriate emotion
- Their deep thinking and ability to analyze things from all angles
- Protecting their families from evil systems of thought
Idealist men value being respected for:
- Providing a safe emotional environment for their families
- Their passion and compassion
- Their insights into others' behavior and thinking
- Spending time with their families to maintain everyone's positive attachment to everyone else
- Having a clear view of who they are, their purpose in life, and their progress towards fulfilling that purpose
- Protecting their families from evil spiritual influences
https://www.keirsey.com/personalityzone/lz52.asp
(Get Back) That Lovin' Feelin'
By Dr. Lovegood
More songs and possibly more poems have been written about love than any other topic. Happy-in-love songs are usually pretty sappy while crossed-in-love songs tend to seem more substantial and true to life. Here are some tips to help you become or continue to be happily, sappily in love. As I wrote in
R-E-S-P-E-C-T, many of these tips will work equally well for men of the same temperament.
How Guardian women want to be shown love:
- Guardians generally work very hard to keep the family going. Recognize that by spoiling them with bubble baths, time alone, back rubs, small gifts, and the like
- Comment positively on new hairstyles, new clothing, weight lost/gained, effects of working out, and the like
- Praise for good household and money management
- Run interference for them with people or situations they find especially stressful
- They want to be seen as physically desirable
How Artisan women want to be shown love:
- Physical pampering including back rubs, brushing hair, putting lotion on, and sometimes more active games, such as can't catch me or wrestling
- Comment positively on their elegance of motion and physical conditioning, along with hair and clothes
- Praise for positive thinking and playful spirit
- Provide structure in areas where they are weak without making a jail
- They want to be seen as physically irresistible
How Rational women want to be shown love:
- Listen to their ideas and offer suggestions which say that their ideas are worth pursuing
- Allow them to handle things without interference or second-guessing
- Praise for incisive and radical thinking
- Take care of things in the sensing world for them, such as housework, car maintenance, and repairs
- They want to be seen as having an irresistibly beautiful mind
How Idealist women want to be shown love:
- Listen to them without trying to solve problems. Periodically summarize, synthesize, and restate so it is clear you are listening intelligently
- Express your belief that they can come up with good answers to problems but be prepared to provide shelter when the fallout gets unbearable
- Praise for their insights into people and their ability to help people
- Protect them from emotional devastation
- They want to be seen as having an irresistibly beautiful soul
Care and Feeding of a Mate
A 4 Part Series
By Dr. Lovegood
https://www.keirsey.com/personalityzone/lz31.asp