Hi everyone here, I guess you guys remember me haha, it has been long time
I came here again after I have dream about this website, my dream that I met some of the members in this website I talked to a three woman, one only is identified the other two are not known in my bedroom. Since that dream yesterday I have weird urge to come here again, so I spend hours yesterday watched all the pages since I left, it took me long time.
I really like this website but the reason I left is I felt this website is contributing to my obsession with Kpop, weirdly though, this website supposed to help us to break our obsession with Kpop but for some strange reason, it wasn't working with me in that way
any way, I really broke the bondage Kpop have on me, and I was very Happy for that matter
...Thanks to two things Football and Buddhism.
as world cup is coming in, I have started to obsess over football which always used to be my passion before Kpop came in and it turns things upside down for me
...football at least is harmless and obsessing over it is very ok for me, but for Kpop is no no, its really upsetting is that I have so unhealthy relationship with Kpop, though that could be because of Kpop and its toxic industry.
The most important thing is thanks to Buddhism, I can't thanks Buddha enough on how his teaching has break this toxic bondage of Kpop, if I am not Buddhist, I don't really know how could I break this bondage, its great religion but I am not here to convert any one I am just talking to what I went through in the past months.
As for Jonghyun, I was really so sad for his death and dwelt for this after few months from his death and I was wondered why his death have such devastating influence on me, he wasn't even my bias in SHINee and he was the least one that I liked in SHINee, not that I didn't liked him I did but other members I liked morethan him, even my father who doesn't knows kpop asked me, why are you putting this person to be so important like a prophet, he says people died everyday, you should move on, I moved on finally before month, some time till today I still feel sad but I moved on from that sadness and continue thinking of him as the most important thing, any way, if he is dead, I wish he is nice place and I believed the Aqua moon was indicating of that as I have posted here before, many here didn't believe it though but thats what I think any way, if he is not dead which part of me like 20% think that, I wish him to be in good place and that he is happy. So I tend to think in both cases it was good situation for him, I think it should be thats it about Jonghyun and people should move on from his death, because dwelling in it and thinking too much of it, won't do good, and won't change anything, he already gone from us, whether really dead or faked his death.
as for some rumor I have read here thats dispatch have about Jonghyun, its actually true, and I have posted about that in my older post, but again who cares about this, lets the guy rest in peace.
Also before yesterday I have annoying dream about BTS, I have dream that Jin appeared in a video game and he won't be defeated no matter how much we try, then someone told my brother that BTS is actually an evil group and they thrive on blood sacrifices and that Jonghyun was sacrifice for them, I just waked up annoyed from this dream.
any way, long rant I know haha, but thanks for reading it, hope the best for everyone.