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pescatarian09

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Your cat's gonna kill you

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UnNews:Your cat's gonna kill you

Saturday, April 25, 2020
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Cats are more deadly than they seem, according to science.

EVERYWHERE -- According to new research, your cat is secretly plotting to kill you. Have you ever wondered what they do when they go outside or nap all day? Or poop on the carpet because they refused to go in the litter box?
They spent all day and night plotting when, where and how to make their owners expire. "It's like The Lion King," says a top scientist, Dexter Poin, "They don't just punch you off a cliff and call it a day. They prolong it, savor the moment. They kind of get off to it."
 
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pescatarian09

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Trump declares COVID-19 a terrorist organization

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UnNews:Trump declares COVID-19 a terrorist organization
In the latest episode of the reality show series Coronavirus Briefings, U.S. President Donald Trump told Americans the novel coronavirus, COVID-19, is now listed as a terrorist organization. According to the President's remarks today, the terrorist organization is operating many cells around the world to spread its ideology of death and is using biological weapons against the United States.

The news comes as no surprise to anyone following the President's continued anthropomorphizing of the virus, describing it as “evil” and an "invisible enemy" we are “at war” with. Some government medical experts disputed the President's suggestion that the virus has intentions or motives, but they have all since been fired for being wrong. The President also sent millions of Americans a “You're Welcome” letter along with their coronavirus relief checks, assuring Americans that they should be grateful. The letter describes the ongoing pandemic and government's response as waging "total war against an invisible enemy."

When asked what the plans are to deal with the terrorist threat, the President reminded everyone that the previous Presidents “foolishly got rid of our chemical weapons stockpiles, and someone should really look into that, because we need to use chemical weapons to fight this hateful virus. But COVID, if you're listening, we are coming after you.”
 
Maes17

Maes17

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pescatarian09 said:
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Trump declares COVID-19 a terrorist organization

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UnNews:Trump declares COVID-19 a terrorist organization
In the latest episode of the reality show series Coronavirus Briefings, U.S. President Donald Trump told Americans the novel coronavirus, COVID-19, is now listed as a terrorist organization. According to the President's remarks today, the terrorist organization is operating many cells around the world to spread its ideology of death and is using biological weapons against the United States.

The news comes as no surprise to anyone following the President's continued anthropomorphizing of the virus, describing it as “evil” and an "invisible enemy" we are “at war” with. Some government medical experts disputed the President's suggestion that the virus has intentions or motives, but they have all since been fired for being wrong. The President also sent millions of Americans a “You're Welcome” letter along with their coronavirus relief checks, assuring Americans that they should be grateful. The letter describes the ongoing pandemic and government's response as waging "total war against an invisible enemy."

When asked what the plans are to deal with the terrorist threat, the President reminded everyone that the previous Presidents “foolishly got rid of our chemical weapons stockpiles, and someone should really look into that, because we need to use chemical weapons to fight this hateful virus. But COVID, if you're listening, we are coming after you.”
Click to expand...
These are great. Much needed light hearted ness
 
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pescatarian09

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Did you know...
... that you can always pay your credit card bills using your credit card?
... that water is bad for your health because fish have sex in it?
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Uncyclopedia: The fair and balanced, highly accurate, content-free encyclopedia that anyone can edit. Accept no substitute!
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... ketchup is a vegetable?
 
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morita

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www.thefeminineawakened.com

The Collective Female Pain body Taoism, Yoga Teacher, Spiritual healer

♥️The collective Female Pain body♥️ Apart from a personal pain body, every person has a collective pain body. (unless fully awakened) The collective female pain body awakens particular around the pre menstrual phase. It lies dormant for most of the month and then suddenly it throws you off your fee
www.thefeminineawakened.com www.thefeminineawakened.com
very interesting read.
 
Maes17

Maes17

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Covid and riots are the news and all.
But let’s not deny the fact that the bitch known as Carole fucking Baskin just took over Joe Exotic’s zoo.


#FreeJoe
 
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pescatarian09

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What's the plural of asparagus?
asparageese!!
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(quack)

Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom?
Because the “P” is silent
 
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