How would you feel about a sexless relationship

midn8t_suns3t

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Idk if it's the right place to post, that's why I'm posting this in the off-topic section. I really want honest and serious opinions thx
I'll start: That's the kind of relationship i'd prefer honestly.
I think it's really sad that there is such emphasis on sex rather than on building a real emotional connection in relationships. My partner would have to be like my best friend.
 

FilthPig

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From biological perspective the purpose of sex is to make new humans,from spiritual perspective it is to balance energies.From simpletons perspective it is to "feel good" .
Male and female energies are different,it's like square waves vs round waves that compensate and balance each other.When those energies are out of balance then people tend to get rather emotional.Some people dont need that balancing ,they can do it naturally.They dont need outer source to get opposite energy spectrum and dont need an outlet to give away their extra accumulation of energy.But if mind/soul aint evolved enough to control the body then the body will control the mind...
Tesla consciously avoided sex all his life to conserve and direct all his energy into his mind/imagination.
Newton never got layd yet he was probably the biggest genius the world has seen.It does seem that great things can be achieved when that sexual energy is directed/transformed to mental energy.But most people just waste it and abuse it.
Orgasm is usually a tremendous waste of energy unless you dont let it leave through your legs and instead direct it out through your head.Then it will remain circling and can have an very energizing effect for quite some time.

Personally i dont feel much about other peoples relationships and what are their bedroom activities.Just like celebrity news ,i could not care less because it aint worthy of my attention.
I think it's really sad that there is such emphasis on sex rather than on building a real emotional connection in relationships.
It's because most people are selfish simpletons who are only concerned about their physical well-being.
 

Ludo

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So you just need to find a person who thinks the same. If you both are comfortable in such relationships, there is nothing bad. As for me, I think I wouldn't be happy in such relationships. Sex isn't the most important, however, a part I wouldn't give up. I'll buy viagra online when my sex drive lowers until it disappears for sure. I won't give up so easily. Nevertheless, I'm sure when we'll enter the stage of sexless relationships with my wife, we will still have a great time together and we will have something to talk about.
 
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midn8t_suns3t

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So you just need to find a person who thinks the same.
I wasn't seeking advice, I was asking if it was a common thing or if people would consider it a dealbreaker. Consider it a survey if you will.
This does not answer my op. (and the fact that 2 people in a relationship should think the same goes without saying, it's a redundant argument).
 
Joined
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Idk if it's the right place to post, that's why I'm posting this in the off-topic section. I really want honest and serious opinions thx
I'll start: That's the kind of relationship i'd prefer honestly.
I think it's really sad that there is such emphasis on sex rather than on building a real emotional connection in relationships. My partner would have to be like my best friend.
I have the feeling op is a former member, but i think this is an interesting topic so I'll reply regardless... hope the entire thread doesn't vanish into nothingness...

In my opinion, i think a (best) friendship is the best kind of partnership. Too many people just focus on the physical attraction aspects and when that goes away or gets old then their relationship seems to deteriorate.

Doesn't mean it's not possible for relationships based on friendship to drift apart, but in my opinion its a more lasting connection.

Regarding s*x, i think this society/culture puts too much emphasis on it. It's alienating, to those who dont feel that way. I dont believe in this whole "identifying as" stuff, but there are people who are more asexual or lower sex drives than other and there's nothing wrong with that.

If the couple wants biological children, as long as the male is able to function during the female's fertile time it should not be a problem if they're abstinent most of the time.
 

midn8t_suns3t

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I have the feeling op is a former member, but i think this is an interesting topic so I'll reply regardless... hope the entire thread doesn't vanish into nothingness...
I asked this question on reddit too and had countless responses. But don't seem to have that many answers here, probably bc the forum doesn't have as many members besides the kpop threads, I'd probably should have asked there, I would have had more answers. I've been lurking for some time now but never had an account here.
In my opinion, i think a (best) friendship is the best kind of partnership. Too many people just focus on the physical attraction aspects and when that goes away or gets old then their relationship seems to deteriorate.

Doesn't mean it's not possible for relationships based on friendship to drift apart, but in my opinion its a more lasting connection.

Regarding s*x, i think this society/culture puts too much emphasis on it. It's alienating, to those who dont feel that way. I dont believe in this whole "identifying as" stuff, but there are people who are more asexual or lower sex drives than other and there's nothing wrong with that.
I agree.
If the couple wants biological children, as long as the male is able to function during the female's fertile time it should not be a problem if they're abstinent most of the time.
I also agree but i've seen very few people if no one at all live by this dogma throughout my life despite being raised in a religious environment Premarital sex is supposed to be a "sin" according to god, same when it comes to lust, it's all the same.
 

redqueen

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May 15, 2017
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5,956
I do Believe it's a 100% ok to want
more of an emotional based bond
with someone instead of a sexual
based bond

many that I Know who've been together
for decades/some who haven't,do find
themselves for w/e reasons not wanting
that physical anymore and are actually Happier
for it

I Believe it takes a whole lot more of
a deeper connection to keep a couple
together without the need of having
the "well the sex is good"mentality

that only keeps some in relationships
they really aren't committed too or in
some cases don't even want to be
in

its a stronger Love when Ya Know it's
not just the physical connection between
Ya's it's much deeper than that

I've been abused and can Honestly say
that sometimes I can't be touched as I'm
too in my head and reliving those abuses

I'm extremely lucky that I have that solid
based relationship for over 25yrs now
many find Happiness,Love and contentment
in having that sexless kind of relationship
 
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2,264
I've been lurking for some time now but never had an account
My apologies. Didn't mean to call you out.

I asked this question on reddit too and had countless responses
If you don't mind sharing, what were the reddit responses. Mostly for or against?

I also agree but i've seen very few people if no one at all live by this dogma throughout my life despite being raised in a religious environment Premarital sex is supposed to be a "sin" according to god, same when it comes to lust, it's all the same.
Perhaps some people who have this dynamic in their relationship keep that fact hidden due to societal expectations and judgments. I personally don't disclose something like that with people i know due to not wanting to hear comments about my marriage. Even if know it's not a "bad relationship" i dont want to HEAR them say it.

From what I've seen culture tends to be a dominant force that overrides or overshadows religion. If we live in a s*x-obsessed culture it seems to be through that cultural lens that everything is viewed. It is taken for granted than people will be wanting this. And while im sure many people have struggled with lust throughout history, the blatant s*xualization through the media has done much to exacerbate the problem for those who struggle with it.

in general religious people push the narrative that males will be the ones who primarily will struggle with this. On the other side, feminists will argue the fact that "women lust too". The creating of identities like "asexual" or "demisexual" actually contributes to the othering of people who would prefer less physical contact, in my opinion. It is only because the expectation that everyone is interested that there even is a label of being an "other".
 

midn8t_suns3t

Rookie
Joined
Dec 9, 2022
Messages
50
I do Believe it's a 100% ok to want
more of an emotional based bond
with someone instead of a sexual
based bond

many that I Know who've been together
for decades/some who haven't,do find
themselves for w/e reasons not wanting
that physical anymore and are actually Happier
for it

I Believe it takes a whole lot more of
a deeper connection to keep a couple
together without the need of having
the "well the sex is good"mentality

that only keeps some in relationships
they really aren't committed too or in
some cases don't even want to be
in

its a stronger Love when Ya Know it's
not just the physical connection between
Ya's it's much deeper than that

I've been abused and can Honestly say
that sometimes I can't be touched as I'm
too in my head and reliving those abuses

I'm extremely lucky that I have that solid
based relationship for over 25yrs now
many find Happiness,Love and contentment
in having that sexless kind of relationship
Thank you for your thoughful post @redqueen.
Regarding this, there is a group on the internet called incels who are hateful and depressed bc they can't find a partner or sexual relationships.
The stuff they post is already hateful enough. But the response to them "just pay for it" is just as disturbing/fucked up imo.
If you believe the foundation of a relationship is sex, of course you think it can easily be replaced by paying for a prostitute, despite it not being true. Paying for sex can never replace the bond that two people can form and it's not gonna be a cure for your loneliness. It's dehumanizing for both parties, and just goes to show how primal humans are, despite claimign that we're more evolved as other mammals.

many find Happiness,Love and contentment
in having that sexless kind of relationship
And i think it should be normalized. Like, if you say you are seeing someone or are in a relationship w them, people immediately assume you're havign or had sex with them, that's just not something that people question. And people believe if there is no(or little) sex that the relationship is on shaky ground, or that it's failing.
 
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