Healing A Transexual, Possible?

[Tatilina]

wow shes kinda nasty and very passive aggressive, makes sense why she wouldnt want anybody standing up to bullies now!!

I find this offensive cause I know you have taken great pleasure when I am being bullied lol. You LOVE IT. You really have some nerve.

 

[mecca]

Good luck in trying to end bullying

Bullying won't end but in a lot of cases it can be prevented and if it isn't prevented, the people affected can be helped.

 

[Tatilina]

wow shes kinda nasty and very passive aggressive, makes sense why she wouldnt want anybody standing up to bullies now!!

And also this is a very sad and poor reaction to someone who you love to see being bullied and can't stop taking shots at me and then continue to keep criticizing me....like WOW! You are a piece of grand ART. I won't bother wasting any more time with you.

 

[Tatilina]

I'll keep continuing to stand up for myself, thanks,

 

[Aero]

Yes stand up to bullies, and stand up for the little guys. That's what I say. But I'm not picky about how one goes about it. I think it's more about picking your battles. And deploying a methodology that can win those battles. Winning is winning, and everybody loves a winner.

We can't eradicate bullying and make everyone be nice to each other. However if we collectively focus on small victories, we can make a difference. I'm sure that's not enough for some people but, the world sucks. And there is nobody we can blame to make it better. It's on us

 

[Tatilina]

yea because bullies totally care about that lmfao everyone knows its bad, people still do it.

100% truth. It's even worse when bully encouragers try to talk the talk but not walk the walk cause all they care about is making themselves look good! And when the person who is being bullied stands up for themselves, they are seen as the angry nasty one. You're fucked if you don't take your bullying like a good little girl or stand up and defend yourself and then have hell to pay. Lol. Lmfao.

 

[Tatilina]

The best way to start by standing up to bullying is to NOT be a bystander cheering for the bullying on the sidelines encouraging it! That is a GREAT place to start....,
Don't be ALL talk and NO action.
You can't be for and against something at the same time!

 

[Tatilina]

Yes stand up to bullies, and stand up for the little guys. That's what I say. But I'm not picky about how one goes about it. I think it's more about picking your battles. And deploying a methodology that can win those battles. Winning is winning, and everybody loves a winner.

We can't eradicate bullying and make everyone be nice to each other. However if we collectively focus on small victories, we can make a difference. I'm sure that's not enough for some people but, the world sucks. And there is nobody we can blame to make it better. It's on us

Lol like you were any help. I do have a problem with my bully supporters.

I just want to vomit.... the hypocrisy, like WTF!!!

 

[UnspokenSoliloquy]

Einstein's theories are totally different. His theories were based on facts.
.

I laughed way too long at this. "his theories are based on facts" LOLZ

 

[rainerann]

Yes stand up to bullies, and stand up for the little guys. That's what I say. But I'm not picky about how one goes about it. I think it's more about picking your battles. And deploying a methodology that can win those battles. Winning is winning, and everybody loves a winner.

We can't eradicate bullying and make everyone be nice to each other. However if we collectively focus on small victories, we can make a difference. I'm sure that's not enough for some people but, the world sucks. And there is nobody we can blame to make it better. It's on us

I know this is off topic, but I will say that when I notice a remark that seems insulting, I won't like what they say. It wouldn't matter if they said they had accepted Christ the same day in the same post. I don't like the idea of having my identity approving some of the comments I have been seeing. I am surprised by how many people will like something when someone has genuinely said something insulting to someone else. It is one thing to say it and vent or whatever. Sometimes people just need to vent a little bit, it makes them feel better. It is another thing to partner with some of these insults. I don't know whether it is a victory of any kind, but it is just something that is important to me. I don't want someone to see me like something that is genuinely personal in nature. It just makes me feel uncomfortable. So this is how I try to help reduce bullying.

 

[JoChris]

I know this is off topic, but I will say that when I notice a remark that seems insulting, I won't like what they say. It wouldn't matter if they said they had accepted Christ the same day in the same post. I don't like the idea of having my identity approving some of the comments I have been seeing. I am surprised by how many people will like something when someone has genuinely said something insulting to someone else. It is one thing to say it and vent or whatever. Sometimes people just need to vent a little bit, it makes them feel better. It is another thing to partner with some of these insults. I don't know whether it is a victory of any kind, but it is just something that is important to me. I don't want someone to see me like something that is genuinely personal in nature. It just makes me feel uncomfortable. So this is how I try to help reduce bullying.

You reminded me of this. http://changingminds.org/techniques/assertiveness/comparing_behaviors.htm
There are three options - aggressive, submissive, assertive.
Assertiveness is the only healthy option. http://changingminds.org/techniques/assertiveness/assertiveness_is.htm

Defending yourself/ someone else without resorting to attack can be learned, even people who think they're incapable of change.

 

[Aero]

I don't think I ever made it seem like bullying is Ok. I think I've showed the opposite, that it's ok to be real. Am I the perfect model for positive behavior? Probably not, but I highly doubt anyone really is. I'm not here to give speeches, or analyze everyone. Because why? Like I said picking battles is important.

If you only worry about what you can control, you have less worries. I can't control what people think, and figuring people out is mostly irrelevant information. That's why my strategy is to put on a show, and put myself in that "game". When you set examples in that fashion, background noise is tuned out. You can focus on your goals and putting on the next show.

 

[The Zone]

A person should ask themselves if they invited bullying at times. We are all responsible for our actions past and present. Sometimes, only consistent behavior will fend off bullying and then there is the question of what actually constitutes true bullying.

Some take it too far and once that starts it is hard to stop them. What I see is a beef here that leaked onto the forum. This altered peoples conduct and when that happens there is more clairity in seeing a persons true colors. I have certainly been sarcastic with some but only in reminding them of their constant need for drama and maddeningly shifting views. I wish them no ill will and saw where some comments towards them got much meaner yesterday but one must consider the history of those sources. If you have a history of being banned you have to live that down. It would help if there was a true effort at atonement instead of playing the victim card and spliting people forcing them to take one side or another which enters one in to black and white thinking.

There is an ignore feature on the forum and you cannot say you use it and then show you don't. Firstly, this shows dishonesty and secondly that one may possibly thrive on words and said drama. We give words power with our actions and it is hard as heck to not respond to someone or put them in their place when they are being a jerk. But these personal beefs should play out on PM's and not the forum which is suffering from spliting of late and moving back to the old forums way which were wild, wild west in the end with sordid conduct and little accountability.

 

[JoChris]

It is very disappointing to see grown adults act like petty teenagers online.

I saw the dirty tactic of bringing skeletons brought out of the closet used all the time at my house while growing up. When I see people stoop to that tactic I lose sympathy for them immediately.

Forgiveness is needed by a few of you for your own sake. It doesn't mean you have trust the opposite party.

 

[Aero]

I don't know anything about people's personal issues. But I have to urgently suggest trying to separate yourself from such things. It kind of goes back to what we walked about in that "empathy" thread. By getting involved personally, you are opening up your own boundaries to other people. And that's usually a bad idea.

By attacking them you show your own flaws, and when sharks taste blood they never lay off you. So you can either be constantly on the defensive from sharks, or you can be swimming away from the sharks.

 

[Corvus Metus]

yea because bullies totally care about that lmfao everyone knows its bad, people still do it.

A bully will stop being a bully if he knows that he can't get away with his actions. The reasons they do what they do is because they get away with it. Even when people stand up to them and they leave that person alone, they move on to someone else... Because no one from the top tells them to stop.

 

[manama]

A bully will stop being a bully if he knows that he can't get away with his actions. The reasons they do what they do is because they get away with it. Even when people stand up to them and they leave that person alone, they move on to someone else... Because no one from the top tells them to stop.

"don't bully"

omg totally works, omg bullying has ended omg world is so pure now lol, if eradicating bullying was that easy it would have ended long time ago. People who do bad, don't care about law, rules or morals. Theyll do it even if it gets them in trouble

 

[Carolyn]

I know this is off topic, but I will say that when I notice a remark that seems insulting, I won't like what they say. It wouldn't matter if they said they had accepted Christ the same day in the same post. I don't like the idea of having my identity approving some of the comments I have been seeing. I am surprised by how many people will like something when someone has genuinely said something insulting to someone else. It is one thing to say it and vent or whatever. Sometimes people just need to vent a little bit, it makes them feel better. It is another thing to partner with some of these insults. I don't know whether it is a victory of any kind, but it is just something that is important to me. I don't want someone to see me like something that is genuinely personal in nature. It just makes me feel uncomfortable. So this is how I try to help reduce bullying.

Is this because I liked US comment above? Just wondering?

Its not always possible to completely get the complete meaning behind others words online but I get the impression from some in this thread that because they dont agree with homosexuality and arent comfortable being around "that kind of thing" when I say that kind of thing its to illustrate the way some people define things like homosexuality, transgenderism etc as being something thats wrong and that they dont agree with and therefore they dont really give a shit if somebody is singled out or bullied because of this because they view it as wrong anyway. That really pisses me off and really pushes my buttons. To me if you are a "christian" then you shouldnt be biased against anybody because of their sexual orientation or whatever kind of minority category somebody might fall into, are you not meant to be christian towards everybody and not just other people who identify as being christian? Its kind of sad that somebody can be so ignorant and not care about somebody just because of their sexual orientation or gender orientation.

It just seems to me to speak volumes about what that person is really like. Its like they dont care if somebody is being persecuted in any way because of this because they dont agree with it and therefore its kind of ok to bully and harass these people because they are against what I believe? But really if you believe in god so much and see yourself as a christian is it not god that created people who are homosexual and transgendered? So doesnt that mean that you are disagreeing with your god!?

I think maybe I need to stay out of this conversation for now, my heads not 100% clear right now.

 

[rainerann]

Is this because I liked US comment above? Just wondering?

Its not always possible to completely get the complete meaning behind others words online but I get the impression from some in this thread that because they dont agree with homosexuality and arent comfortable being around "that kind of thing" when I say that kind of thing its to illustrate the way some people define things like homosexuality, transgenderism etc as being something thats wrong and that they dont agree with and therefore they dont really give a shit if somebody is singled out or bullied because of this because they view it as wrong anyway. That really pisses me off and really pushes my buttons. To me if you are a "christian" then you shouldnt be biased against anybody because of their sexual orientation or whatever kind of minority category somebody might fall into, are you not meant to be christian towards everybody and not just other people who identify as being christian? Its kind of sad that somebody can be so ignorant and not care about somebody just because of their sexual orientation or gender orientation.

It just seems to me to speak volumes about what that person is really like. Its like they dont care if somebody is being persecuted in any way because of this because they dont agree with it and therefore its kind of ok to bully and harass these people because they are against what I believe? But really if you believe in god so much and see yourself as a christian is it not god that created people who are homosexual and transgendered? So doesnt that mean that you are disagreeing with your god!?

I think maybe I need to stay out of this conversation for now, my heads not 100% clear right now.

Oh no Carolyn not at all. I think I read the post your referring to, but your comment was relevant to the discussion and not directed at anyone in particular. I was referring to people making personal insults directed at another poster, or posters in particular. That kind of thing. It was more of a general comment towards the presence of personal insults. I didn't see your comment as being personally directed at anyone. I guess I would disagree that everyone fits this definition, but I'm sure you are already aware there are exceptions to this, and this isn't a new discussion either, so no one should take what you said personally unless they have a reason to feel guilty maybe. Anyways, sorry for the confusion. Just venting myself a little bit.

 

[Corvus Metus]

"don't bully"

omg totally works, omg bullying has ended omg world is so pure now lol, if eradicating bullying was that easy it would have ended long time ago. People who do bad, don't care about law, rules or morals. Theyll do it even if it gets them in trouble

Yes. And people who do good can't ignore evil. We can't simply stand down and accept that there will always be those who seek to hurt or oppress others. Even if its a losing fight, it's a fight that good people need to be part of. If someone isn't capable of standing up for themselves, someone needs to stand up for them.

"There's always going to be bullying!" There's always going to be hungry. There's always going to be poverty. There's always going to be war. But we, as individuals don't need to accept it. We don't need to throw in the towel and accept fate. We can deny it. We can fight against. Because fuck believing that doing the right thing in this world is futile.

Bullies are the same type of evil that rules this world. They are just a lesser form of it.