Goals/Time Management/Optimal Living

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Psychological Facts That Will Blow Your Mind! - Rory Sutherland
This was entertaining to watch - thanks! I had to smile at the K-Cup machine segment because my siblings bought my parents one of those and eventually my dad grew tired of it. He said he got frustrated of trying to find stores that sell the cups and when he did, the selection of coffee was limited. He went out and bought a normal coffee maker to replace it and enjoys brewing coffee of his choosing again. :D

Also, I don't understand the popularity of Uber, but this is obviously a personal thing. The fact that some Uber encounters are now making it to crime documentaries tells me all I need to know about the service. However, I have a neighbour who loves it so to each their own...
 

The Agrarian

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Highly, highly, HIGHLY recommend y'all check out this book for anyone struggling with executive functioning.

(Disclaimer: Sorry for the Amazon link. We all hate Jeff Bezos, It just popped up first.)

 

DesertRose

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K-Cup machine s
Darn I was just thinking I wanted one of those but I trust your dad's judgement.
The fact that some Uber encounters are now making it to crime documentaries tells me all I need to know about the service.
Come to think of it. Uber does not feel impersonal like a taxi service it feels personal and awkward for moi.
Highly, highly, HIGHLY recommend y'all check out this book for anyone struggling with executive functioning.
Thank you Agrarian and welcome to this thread !!!
 
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I stumbled across this blog and thought the writer shared some good insight and thought I could add it to your thread, DR :):

10 Bad Habits You Must Eliminate If You Want A Happy Life
By Afam Uche


1. Comparison
2. Negative Beliefs
3. Unhealthy Routines Practices
4. Crave For Approval And Validation
5. Lack Of Authenticity (Following the crowd)
6. Quest For Perfection
7. Procrastination
8. Preserving Negative Presence
9. Not Forgiving Yourself
10. Dehydration

(source)
 

DesertRose

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I stumbled across this blog and thought the writer shared some good insight and thought I could add it to your thread, DR :):

10 Bad Habits You Must Eliminate If You Want A Happy Life
By Afam Uche


1. Comparison
2. Negative Beliefs
3. Unhealthy Routines Practices
4. Crave For Approval And Validation
5. Lack Of Authenticity (Following the crowd)
6. Quest For Perfection
7. Procrastination
8. Preserving Negative Presence
9. Not Forgiving Yourself
10. Dehydration

(source)
Thanks OM I really appreciate and am grateful for contributions in this thread!
I solemnly swear to be more authentic and less dehydrated :)
Very good insights thanks!
 
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rbbovino

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I stumbled across this blog and thought the writer shared some good insight and thought I could add it to your thread, DR :):

10 Bad Habits You Must Eliminate If You Want A Happy Life
By Afam Uche


1. Comparison
2. Negative Beliefs
3. Unhealthy Routines Practices
4. Crave For Approval And Validation
5. Lack Of Authenticity (Following the crowd)
6. Quest For Perfection
7. Procrastination
8. Preserving Negative Presence
9. Not Forgiving Yourself
10. Dehydration

(source)
11. Eating gluten
 

DesertRose

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Pescatarian sometimes I do not see posts!
Thank you, barak Allah feek! Ahlan Wa Sahlan to this thread! Btw, Look forward to reading that!

11. Eating gluten
Welcome! Gluten is a hard one to stop, for sure.
 
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Pescatarian sometimes I do not see posts!
Thank you, barak Allah feek! Ahlan Wa Sahlan to this thread! Btw, Look forward to reading that!
Wa feek ukhti! I liked it because first, it relates self-development to the Islamic purpose of life, which I have not come across before very often, and second, it is realistic, and doesn't make false promises or inspire false hope, like a lot of gimmicky, popular self-improvement advice. Always, if we do not relate our efforts back to the purpose for which we were created, then we will fail, or not find true contentment, because true success comes from Allah, and not from ourselves. I hope it will benefit you! I've forgotten a lot of it, so I need to re-read it again myself!
 

DesertRose

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Always, if we do not relate our efforts back to the purpose for which we were created, then we will fail, or not find true contentment, because true success comes from Allah, and not from ourselves. I hope it will benefit you!
بارك الله فيك Just got around to reading this! Very valuable!!!

"Purpose driven instead of passion driven means we are driven by our servitude to Allah instead of serving our own ego (nafs). Passion is illusory. It brings a temporary happiness but lacks the ability to create fulfillment."
"Purpose is about pursuing something outside yourself as opposed to pleasuring yourself”
“Purpose is defined as the sense that you are contributing to others, that your work has broader meaning. Passion is the feeling of excitement or enthusiasm you have about your work.”
“Oftentimes, We do something, we get really good at it, and then we become passionate about it. It’s a totally different approach than waiting for your passion for decades, without knowing whether it’s something you can succeed at or make a living from.”
“The box-checking exercise tends to be about my wants. Shifting it to others’ needs brings greater well-being. This is straightforward: Decades of research—and millennia of common sense—have shown that self-centeredness leads to fluctuating emotions at best, while a focus on the needs of others can bring stable happiness. And lest you think this makes a person passive or unambitious, note that there is a significant body of evidence showing that a focus on the good of one’s institution (as opposed to oneself) enhances career success as well.”
 
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بارك الله فيك Just got around to reading this! Very valuable!!!

"Purpose driven instead of passion driven means we are driven by our servitude to Allah instead of serving our own ego (nafs). Passion is illusory. It brings a temporary happiness but lacks the ability to create fulfillment."
"Purpose is about pursuing something outside yourself as opposed to pleasuring yourself”
“Purpose is defined as the sense that you are contributing to others, that your work has broader meaning. Passion is the feeling of excitement or enthusiasm you have about your work.”
“Oftentimes, We do something, we get really good at it, and then we become passionate about it. It’s a totally different approach than waiting for your passion for decades, without knowing whether it’s something you can succeed at or make a living from.”
“The box-checking exercise tends to be about my wants. Shifting it to others’ needs brings greater well-being. This is straightforward: Decades of research—and millennia of common sense—have shown that self-centeredness leads to fluctuating emotions at best, while a focus on the needs of others can bring stable happiness. And lest you think this makes a person passive or unambitious, note that there is a significant body of evidence showing that a focus on the good of one’s institution (as opposed to oneself) enhances career success as well.”
Much like this post found on Quora :):

What’s your secret to a happy life?
Julie Gurner April 11
These may be controversial, but here are 12 tips I have found to be true:
  1. Stop Comparing - Being happy in your own skin is one of the biggest keys to happiness I know. A lot of unhappiness comes from people believing that they are “less than” because of images they see or messages they ingest. You can be so much happier going all-in on *you* - those people are magic.
  2. Don’t Settle in Who You Marry - Marriage is the single biggest decision you make, so be picky and marry the *right* person for you. Don’t rush in because you think it’s “time” or you feel “pressure.” Marry someone you are excited about, who makes you feel amazing, who is good to you down to their last breath. Don’t compromise or settle on this one - they will be a large part of the mood of your home every single day…why not make it great?!
  3. Take Care of Physical & Mental Health Problems - A sure way to make happiness harder is being uncomfortable! While it’s not always possible to “cure” everything, address your physical and emotional needs as best as possible. Some people allow themselves to have lingering pains, or struggles with depression. Take the steps to address it. It will change your entire experience of the world.
  4. Do More Things You Like! This sounds silly, but I’ve met people who say they used to *love* painting, but when you ask them, they haven’t done it in 10 years! Why?! Life gets so busy that the first things we cut, are sometimes hobbies - we don’t see them as “essential” or “important,” but they absolutely are when we’re talking about happiness. Make time for things you truly enjoy - it makes life more enjoyable.
  5. Be Okay with Bad Days - Part of living a happy life, is realizing that you won’t be happy 24/7, and being fine with it. You’ll have times of grief, and times of irritation, and times of stress or anxiety…and *that’s fine.* Accepting that you’re a human with a range of emotions, and seeing every day as a new day, is part of what makes you happy. Self-acceptance of *just being human* and not too hard on yourself is massive.
  6. Seek Out the Good/ Minimize the Bad - Your mindset and mood is often influenced by what you feed it. This is true of people you surround yourself with, and even the media you ingest. Limit toxic people. Limit toxic headlines/news media, and seek to spend more time/energy with the good.
  7. Be a Helper - If you want to be happy, there is a lot of joy in helping others. Some of what makes life wonderful is feeling useful, helping another without expecting return, and being reminded of your own good fortune (gratitude)…even if that is driving a friend to a doctor’s appointment, or helping a neighbor her carry their groceries. Making the world a better place makes you feel better too.
  8. Live in the Present - Today is a new day, and some people have pasts that are incredibly hard. Live in the present, not in the past…or you’ll be stuck there and miss the great stuff of today.
  9. Have a Few Bucks in the Bank - This is maybe controversial, but poverty is *stressful,* and if you can pay for the basics comfortably - it will remove a lot of that stress from your life. Solid medical care (and mental health care) in America isn’t cheap, and growing old in poverty is hard. You don’t have to be wealthy, but some amount of financial comfort will prevent the worries about the basics of everyday life.
  10. Move! Being able to move your body a bit will help to keep you happy. I’ve seen seniors doing shows where they dance, and young kids running in the yard. You don’t have to be an olympian to move…just even going for a walk every day, or doing some stretches. Your brain has a way of responding to movement that makes people feel happier.
  11. Have New Experiences - My Mom had Thai food for the first time in her 60s, and it was so much fun to experience together. Doing something new doesn’t have to be traveling to a distant land - maybe it’s just trying your hand at baking a pie, eating a new type of food you’ve never had, or visiting a small town nearby you’ve never been to. New experiences give us things to look forward to, things to talk about, and bring back some of the curiosity of being a child.
  12. Love in Your Life - If you have a person who truly loves you in this world, and accepts you for exactly who you are - it will help contribute to your sense of happiness. Heck, having a pet that loves you can also help this. Love is powerful, and while it isn’t *everything,* it makes the bad times easier to bear. Being loved, and loving another brings many people great satisfaction and joy.
 
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The Agrarian

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Kinda relevant:

If anyone here is struggling with screen-time addiction and the feeling of guilt over wasted time I recommend body-weight exercises. If you can squeeze in the time for binging a streaming service, you do sit-ups. You can do these while listening to music or watching something. Doesn't matter.

As a farm boy, I can personally testify that body-weight routines SLAY your core muscles over anything at a gym. Use that time wisely and get shredded. Good luck.

 

DesertRose

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DesertRose

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This video reinforces the need for meaning and purpose in our lives.
Warning Young Folks: Silence When We Are All Gone

 
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This video reinforces the need for meaning and purpose in our lives.
Warning Young Folks: Silence When We Are All Gone

I've watched segments of it, and will watch it in its' entirety later. What is somewhat unfortunate is the comments regarding the matter from people who are in their 20s. Some claim they can't have any meaningful conversations with anyone their age and that's rather sad. It shows what technology has done to a generation completely raised in it. I see this around me too. People with masks on and completely immersed with their phone, not tuned into the world around them whatsoever.

What's funny is when I was growing up, adults used to say that the Walkman was a huge distraction for us teens. However, we were listening to melodies and at times, shared this music with others. I can remember the days of going to my good friend's home and listening to LPs and 45 singles together and sharing our hopes and dreams. We'd then might order a pizza and rent a movie later. These days, kids are communicating with their friends right beside them with a cell phone and not even looking at them while they're doing it. A generation has basically lost the art of conversation and perhaps, as Professor Vaknin has mentioned, the true meaning of life.
 

DesertRose

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Why comfort will ruin your life | Bill Eckstrom | TEDxUniversityofNevada
It is not the complexity triggering events or people that you should fear the most but it is your own willingness to accept or seek discomfort that will dictate he growth of not just you but the entire world.
"Courage is the commitment to begin without any guarantee of success". Goethe
 
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Why comfort will ruin your life | Bill Eckstrom | TEDxUniversityofNevada
It is not the complexity triggering events or people that you should fear the most but it is your own willingness to accept or seek discomfort that will dictate he growth of not just you but the entire world.
"Courage is the commitment to begin without any guarantee of success". Goethe
Bill is spot on! I can appreciate what he's saying as I posted the comment here in the Spirituality thread, quoting one of my favourite songs by The Fixx:

"When you're feeling insecure do you treasure it?
You should treasure it
Feel the pull of nature's course and treasure it
Treasure it
Feel the pull, feel the swing, there's no value
`Til you treasure it”

Many people don't know how to embrace and acknowledge adversity are conditioned to be weak and fearful, therefore, become lackadaisical and complacent individuals. However, it's within those moments of uncertainty, the "fight" or "flight" mode kicks and one either makes the decision to either utilize them to their advantage, or cower to them. However, many want and perhaps even crave predictability/routine because they fear the unknown.
 
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