Feminist Lies That Are Making Women Miserable

kerrichinchilla

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Yesterday's prostitute is today's standard of beauty. Imagine that.
the point of the matter is, the woman in hte image is now deemed as the perfect woman for many conservative men, yet in the early 20th century she would be seen as a whore. Even in modern times many would deem her make up a model for a prostitute.
 






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Sigh, back when women were women...

Why is it a good thing for women to try to look less attractive, such as your 2020 pics clearly show?

Does it take away from girl power to look attractive? Is girl power directly related to a woman’s beauty, or lack thereof?
Who decides what's attractive or unattractive? Or feminine or non-feminine. Some dudes and ladies seem to think long hair is feminine... But as someone who's spent years punk, goth, and metal circles... Long hair is pretty gender neutral. I've also seen women with mohawks that didn't look unfeminine, at least in my opinion.
 






sickgirl15

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Ten Lies of Feminism


At its inception, the feminist movement, accompanied by the sexual revolution, made a series of enticing, exciting promises to women. These promises sounded good, so good that many women deserted their men and their children or rejected the entire notion of marriage and family, in pursuit of "themselves" and a career. These pursuits, which emphasized self-sufficiency and individualism, were supposed to enhance a woman's quality of life and improve her options, as well as her relations with men. Now, a decade or so later, women have had to face the fact that, in many ways, feminism and liberation made promises that could not be delivered.

Lie #1: Women Can Have It All

The first lie is that women can have it all. We were fed an illusion that women, being the superior sex, have an inexhaustible supply of physical and emotional energy that enable us to juggle a career, family, friendships and volunteer service. Proponents of feminism declared that not only can women do what men do, but we ought to do what men do. Since men can't do what women can do--have babies--this put a double burden on women. It wasn't enough that women were already exhausted from the never-ending tasks of child-rearing and homemaking; we were told that women needed to be in the work force as well, contributing to the family financially.

Scripture presents a different picture for men and women. The Bible appears to make a distinction between each gender's primary energies. The commands to women are generally in the realm of our relationships, which is consistent with the way God made women to be primarily relational, being naturally sensitive to others and usually valuing people above things. Scripture never forbids women to be gainfully employed; in fact, the virtuous woman of Proverbs 31 is engaged in several part-time business ventures, in real estate and manufacturing. Nonetheless, it is the excellent care of her husband, her children, her home and her community that inspires the praise she is due. Titus 2 instructs older women to mentor younger women, and teach them to care for their husbands and children and homemaking responsibilities. The God-given strengths of a woman were given to bring glory to God through her womanly differences

Lie #2: Men and Women are Fundamentally the Same

Apart from some minor biological differences, feminism strongly suggested that males and females are fundamentally the same. Culture, it announced, was responsible for turning human blank slates into truck-wielding boys and doll-toting girls. This lie has been very effective at changing the culture. My husband Ray and I offer a seminar at Probe's Mind Games conferences called "Guys Are From Mars, Girls Are From Venus," where we go over the major differences between the sexes. Men, for instance, tend to be more goal-oriented and competitive, where women are more relational and cooperative. Men are active; women are verbal. This is intuitively obvious to the adults in our audience, but it is often new news to high school and college students. We find adults nodding with smiles of recognition, some of them nudging each other in the ribs. In the younger members of the audience, though, we see "the lights come on" in their eyes as they are exposed to something that is obvious and they probably already knew was true, but feminism's worldview had been feeding them a lie. They have been so immersed in this cultural myth that they had accepted it without question. One young man came up to me after a session and said he totally disagreed with me, that there are no real differences between males and females. I asked him if he treated his guy friends the same way he treated his girl friends, and he said, "Of course!" I asked, "And this doesn't cause you any problems?" He said no. With a smile, I suggested he come talk to me in ten years after he'd had a chance to experience real life!

The truth is that God created significant differences between males and females. We can see evidence of this in the fact that Scripture gives different commands for husbands and wives, which are rooted in the differing needs and divinely-appointed roles of men and women.

Lie #3: Desirability is Enhanced by Achievement

The third lie of feminism is that the more a woman achieves, the more attractive and desirable she becomes to men. The importance of achievement to a man's sense of self--an element of masculinity that is, we believe, God-given--was projected onto women. Feminism declared that achieving something, making a mark in the world, was the only measure of success that merited the respect of others. Women who believed this myth found themselves competing with men. Now, competition is appropriate in the business and professional world, but it's disastrous in relationships.

Men do respect and admire accomplished women, just as they do men, but personal relationships operate under a different set of standards. Men most appreciate a woman's unique feminine attributes: love, sensitivity, her abilities to relate. Women have been shocked to discover that their hard-won accomplishments haven't resulted in great relationships with men. Sometimes, being overeducated hampers a woman's ability to relate to men. Men's egos are notoriously fragile, and they are by nature competitive. It's threatening to many men when a woman achieves more, or accomplishes more, or knows more than they do. Feminism didn't warn women of the double standard in relationships: that achievement can and does reap benefits in our careers, but be a stumbling block in our relationships.

The question naturally arises, then, Is it bad for a woman to have a higher degree of education than the man in a relationship? Is it troublesome when a woman is smarter than the man? Should a woman "dumb down" in order to get or keep her man? In the words of the apostle Paul, "May it never be!" A woman living up to the potential of her God-given gifts brings glory to God; it would be an insult to our gracious God to pretend those gifts aren't there. The answer is for women to understand that many men feel threatened and insecure about this area of potential competition, and maintain an attitude of humility and sensitivity about one's strengths; as Romans exhorts us, "Honor[ing] one another above yourselves" (12:10).

Not surprisingly, God already knew about the disparity between the sexes on the issue of achievement. Throughout the Bible, men are called to trust God as they achieve whatever God has called them to do. It's important for men to experience personal significance by making a mark on the world. But God calls women to trust Him in a different area: in our relationships. A woman's value is usually not in providing history-changing leadership and making great, bold moves, but in loving and supporting those around us, changing the world by touching hearts. Once in a while, a woman does make her mark on a national or global scale: consider the biblical judge Deborah, Golda Meir, Margaret Thatcher, and Indira Ghandi. But women like these are the exception, not the rule. And we don't have to feel guilty for not being "exceptional."

Lie #4: The Myth of One's "Unrealized Potential"

Lie number four says that all of us--but especially women--have tremendous potential that simply must be realized. To feminism's way of thinking, just being average isn't acceptable: you must be great.

This causes two problems. First, women are deceived into thinking they are one of the elite, the few, the special. Reality, though, is that most women are ordinary, one of the many. All of us are uniquely gifted by God, but few women are given visible, high- profile leadership roles, which tend to be the only ones that feminism deems valuable. We run into trouble when we're operating under a set of beliefs that don't coincide with reality!

Consequently, many women are operating under unrealistically high expectations of themselves. When life doesn't deliver on their hopes, whether they be making class valedictorian, beauty pageant winner, company president, or neurosurgeon, women are set up for major disappointment. Just being a cog in the wheel of your own small world isn't enough.

This brings us to the second problem. A lot of women beat themselves up for not accomplishing greatness. Instead of investing their life's energies in doing well those things they can do, they grieve what and who they are not. Just being good, or being good at what they do, isn't enough if they're not the best.

Romans 12:3 tells us, "Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought." Rather than worrying about our unrealized potential for some sort of nebulous greatness, we ought to be concerned about being faithful and obedient in the things God has given us to do, trusting Him for the ultimate results. And we ought to not worry about being ordinary as if there were some stigma to it. Scripture says that God is pleased to use ordinary people, because that's how He gets the most glory. (See 1 Corinthians 1:26-31.) There is honor in being an ordinary person in the hand of an extraordinary God.

Lie #5: Sexual Sameness

The fifth lie of feminism is that men and women are the same sexually. This lie comes to us courtesy of the same evil source that brought us the lies of the sexual revolution.

The truth is that women can't separate sex from love as easily as men can. For women, sex needs to be an expression of love and commitment. Without these qualities, sex is demeaning, nothing more than hormones going crazy.

The cost of sex is far greater for women than for men. Sex outside of a committed, loving relationship--I'm talking about marriage here--often results in unplanned pregnancy, sexually transmitted diseases, and profound heartbreak. Every time a woman gives her body away to a man, she gives a part of her heart as well. Sexual "freedom" has brought new degrees of heartache to millions of women. The lie of sexual equality has produced widespread promiscuity and epidemic disease. No wonder so many women are struggling with self-esteem!

God's commands concerning sex take into account the fact that men and women are not the same sexually or any other way. He tells us to exercise self-control before marriage, saving all sexual expression for the constraints of a marriage relationship, and then to keep the marriage bed pure once we are married. When we follow these guidelines, we discover that God's laws provide protection for women: the security of a committed relationship, freedom from sexual health worries, and a stable environment for any children produced in the union. This high standard also protects men by providing a safe channel for their sexual energies. Both chaste single men, and faithful husbands, are kept safe from sexual diseases, unwanted pregnancies with women other than their wives, and the guilt of sexual sin.

Lie #6: The Denial of Maternity

Many women postponed marriage and childbearing to pursue their own personal development and career goals. This perspective denies the reality of a woman's reproductive system and the limitations of time. Childbearing is easier in a woman's 20s and 30s than in her 40s. Plus, there is a physical cost; science has borne out the liabilities that older women incur for themselves and their babies. Midlife women are more prone to have problems getting pregnant, staying pregnant, and then experiencing difficult deliveries. The risk of conceiving a child with Down's Syndrome is considerably higher in older mothers.{3} Fertility treatment doesn't work as well for women over 40.{4}

There is also a spiritual dimension to denying maternity. When women refuse their God-ordained roles and responsibilities, they open themselves to spiritual deception and temptations. 1 Timothy 2:15 is an intriguing verse: "But women will be saved through childbearing." One compelling translation for this verse is, "Women will be kept safe through childbearing," where Paul uses the word for childbearing as a sort of shorthand for the woman's involvement in the domestic sphere--having her "focus on the family," so to speak.(5) When a married woman's priorities are marriage, family and the home, she is kept safe--protected--from the consequences of delaying motherhood and the temptations that beleaguer a woman trying to fill a man's role. For example, I know one married woman who chose to pursue a full-time career in commercial real estate, to the detriment of her family. She confessed that she found herself constantly battling the temptation to lust on two fronts: sexual lust for the men in her office and her clients, and lust for the recognition and material things that marked success in that field. Another friend chose her career over having any children at all, and discovered that like the men in her field, she could not separate her sense of self from her job, and it ultimately cost her her marriage and her life as she knew it. The problem isn't having a career: the problem is when a woman gets her priorities out of balance.

Lie #7: To Be Feminine Is To Be Weak

In the attempt to blur gender distinctions, feminists declared war on the concept of gender-related characteristics. The qualities that marked feminine women--softness, sweetness, kindness, the ability to relate well--were judged as silly, stupid and weak. Only what characterized men--characteristics like firmness, aggressiveness, competitiveness--were deemed valuable.

But when women try to take on male qualities, the end result is a distortion that is neither feminine nor masculine. A woman is perceived as shrill, not spirited. What is expected and acceptable aggression in a man is perceived as unwelcome brashness in a woman. When women try to be tough, it is often taken as unpleasantness. Unfortunately, there really is a strong stereotype about "what women should be like" that merits being torn down. A lot of men are threatened by strong women with opinions and agendas of their own, and treat them with undeserved disrespect. But it is not true that traditionally masculine characteristics are the only ones that count.

There really is a double standard operating, because the characteristics that constitute masculinity and femininity are separate and different, and they are not interchangeable. To be feminine is a special kind of strength. It's a different, appealing kind of power that allows a woman to influence her world in a way quite distinct from the way a man influences the world. It pleased the Lord to create woman to complement man, not to compete with him or be a more rounded copy of him. 1 Corinthians 11:7 says that man is the image and glory of God, but woman is the glory of man. Femininity isn't weakness; it's the glorious, splendid crown on humanity.

Lie #8: Doing is Better Than Being

In his book Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus{6}, John Gray pointed out that men get their sense of self from achievement, and women get their sense of self from relationships. Feminism declared that the male orientation of what you do was the only one that mattered; who you are, and how important you are to the people in your world, didn't count for as much.

This lie said that active is good, passive is bad. Traditional feminine behaviors of being passive and receptive were denounced as demeaning to women and ineffective in the world. Only being the initiator counted, not being the responder. "To listen, to be there, to receive the other with an open heart and mind--this has always been one of the most vital roles of woman. Most women do this quite naturally, but many have come to feel uneasy in this role. Instead, they work frantically on assertiveness, aggression, personal expression, and power, madly suppressing their feminine instincts of love and relatedness."{7}

Women's roles in the family, the church, and the world are a combination of being a responder and an initiator. As a responder, a wife honors her husband through loving submission, and a woman serves the church through the exercise of her spiritual gifts. As an initiator and leader, a woman teaches her children and uses her abilities in the world, such as the woman of Proverbs 31. God's plan is for us to live a balanced life--sometimes active, sometimes passive; sometimes the initiator, sometimes the responder; at all times, submitting both who we are and what we do to the Lordship of Christ.

Lie #9: The Myth of Self-Sufficiency

The ninth lie is the myth of self-sufficiency. Remember the famous feminist slogan that appeared on everything from bumper stickers to t-shirts to notepads? "A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle." The message was clear: women don't need men, who are inferior anyway. The world would be a better place if women ran it: no wars, no greed, no power plays, just glorious cooperation and peace.

The next step after "women don't need men" was logical: women don't need anybody. We can take care of ourselves. Helen Reddy's hit song "I Am Woman" became feminism's theme song, with the memorable chorus, "If I have to, I can do anything / I am strong / I am invincible / I am woman!"

Of course, if women don't need anybody except themselves, they certainly don't need God. Particularly a masculine, patriarchal God who makes rules they don't like and insists that He alone is God. But the need to worship is deeply ingrained in us, so feminist thought gave rise to goddess worship. The goddess was just a female image to focus on; in actuality, goddess worship is worship of oneself.{8}

The lie of self-sufficiency is the same lie that Satan has been deceiving us with since the Garden of Eden: What do you need God for? We grieve the Lord's heart when we believe this lie. Jeremiah 2:13 says, "My people have committed two sins: they have forsaken Me, the spring of living water, and have dug their own cisterns, broken cisterns that cannot hold water." God made us for Himself; believing the lie of self-sufficiency isn't only futile, it's a slap in God's face.

Lie #10: Women Would Enjoy the Feminization of Men

The tenth lie of feminism is that women would enjoy the feminization of men. Feminists believed that the only way to achieve equality of the sexes was to do away with role distinctions. Then they decided that that wasn't enough: society had to do away with gender distinctions, or at the very least blur the lines. Women embraced more masculine values, and men were encouraged to embrace more feminine characteristics. That was supposed to fix the problem. It didn't.

As men tried to be "good guys" and accommodate feminists' demands, the culture saw a new type of man emerge: sensitive, nurturing, warmly compassionate, yielding. The only problem was that this "soft man" wasn't what women wanted. Women pushed men to be like women, and when they complied, nobody respected them. Women, it turns out, want to be the soft ones--and we want men to be strong and firm and courageous; we want a manly man. When men start taking on feminine characteristics, they're just wimpy and unmasculine, not pleasing themselves or the women who demanded the change. There is a good reason that books and movies with strong, masculine heroes continue to appeal to such a large audience. Both men and women respond to men who fulfill God's design for male leadership, protection, and strength.

Underlying the women's liberation movement is an angry, unsubmissive attitude that is fueled by the lies of deception. It's good to know what the lies are, but it's also important to know what God's word says, so we can combat the lies with the power of His truth.


4 Feminist Lies That Are Making Women Miserable

Twenty years ago, I wrote my first book about why women can’t “have it all,” or at least all at once, despite what the culture tells them. (Hint: It’s because no one, male or female, can perform two full-time jobs simultaneously without the bottom falling out.)

At the time, the so-called Mommy Wars were raging. Women everywhere who’d been sold a bill of goods by their feminist mothers and mentors were either lamenting the futility of being able to successfully work full-time outside the home while maintaining a healthy marriage and family life, or they were defending their choice to work full-time by insisting children do fine in round-the-clock substitute care.


Since then, the messages to women about how to have a happy life—as it relates to love and sex, work and family—have merely served to make women miserable. Not only are they unhappier than their mothers and grandmothers ever were, they’re significantly more stressed out; much more so than men.

None of this has done anything to help men and women find their way to one another. Dating in America is all but dead, and marriage is at an all-time low. While there’s more than one reason for this sad state of affairs, at the heart of it are the lies feminists have been telling for years. Here are four, in no particular order.

1. Women Don’t Need Men
It started with a seemingly comical phrase Gloria Steinem didn’t coin but repeatedly used during the height of the 1960s feminist movement: “A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle.” It’s still alive and well today, whether it’s Jennifer Aniston talking about how women “don’t have to fiddle with a man to have that child” or Emma Watson talking about “self-partnering.” Over time, as women began to make their own money and take advantage of the newfound birth control pill, they came to believe that women don’t need men.

They were wrong. Biologically, women are wired to depend on men—regardless of much life has changed. Most women still want to be mothers, and when they do they become vulnerable. Even today, women know instinctively that they will ultimately need a man if they want to have a family and if they want the option of being home at all, if only for a period of time.


Indeed, research shows that what matters most to women—even to those who are economically independent—is knowing they have a man on whom they can rely. It’s the feeling of being safe and in good hands—yes, even financially—that matters most. That is what’s known as hypergamy, and it is alive and well in 2019.

2. Men and Women Are the Same, Or Gender Is a Social Construct
The precise moment in history when the relationship between the sexes took a nosedive is when women began to have sex like a man—casually, with no strings attached—under the guise that women are no different from men and are thus just as capable of having casual sex. Consider this ridiculous Bustle article asserting, based on a dubious study, that men and women are now equally likely to pursue a hookup if approached the right way.

From college campuses to our nation’s boardrooms, many women today have learned to pursue sex the way men often do: no commitment necessary. And they’re getting burned.

If there’s anything that proves this in spades, it’s the so-called campus r*pe crisis and the excesses of Me Too. For if it were true that women are “just like men” in their ability to disentangle sex and emotion, why would campus flings and office dalliances become a cause for the courts rather than a welcome ride?


It’s not just our sexuality that confirms the disparate natures of women and men. Parenting proves it in spades. Once a baby arrives, a woman’s nurturing gene almost always kicks in. Providing for her child emotionally is her first instinct, which is why going back to work so soon is heart-wrenching for mothers.

A father’s reaction is different: his first instinct is to support the family financially. It is not his sole contribution, but it’s first on his list. Simply put, that men and women may both be capable of performing identical tasks doesn’t mean they want to do them with equal fervor. Desire matters.

3. The Biological Clock Isn’t Real
The biological clock may be politically inconvenient, but that doesn’t make it any less real. The ideal age for a woman to get pregnant is 25, noted Gillian Lockwood, medical director at the Midland Fertility Clinic in the U.K., recently: “The bleak reality is that the chance of IVF working with your own eggs once you are 40 is absolutely abysmal…In what other branch of medicine would we let, yet alone encourage, patients to pay for an elective operation with a less than five percent chance of working?”

Because of this, it stands to reason that men can postpone marriage longer than women can. But we don’t tell women this. Instead, we pretend they can map out their lives with career at the center, as men do, as though they won’t hit a point in which their ability to conceive will invariably clash with a career. Articles abound with the goal to obscure the biological reality that it’s easier for women to have babies in their twenties and early thirties.


We lie to women, in other words, to further a political agenda. In doing so, feminists get what they want—for women to reject maternal desire and to instead produce in the marketplace—but women don’t.

Indeed, after decades of following the cultural script, women can often no longer find husbands. Or they can’t have babies. Or if they do get married and have babies, they can’t stay home with them because they mapped out a life that supported an entirely different goal.

4. A Career Is More Meaningful Than Marriage and Children
Of all the lies feminists tell, the idea that career success is more fulfilling than marriage and family is by far the greatest. It is almost impossible to convey the depth of this lie, for it too began in the 1960s, this time with Betty Friedan’s insistence that being a wife and mother is akin to being in a “comfortable concentration camp.” Since that time, American women have been walloped with a steady diet of words and images that drive Friedan’s argument home.

Humans are pack animals: we need to feel part of the group to feel good about ourselves. Some of us are content to stand apart from the crowd, but most are not. Ergo, cultural messages matter.

Women are surprised to discover that work isn’t nearly as satisfying as they were led to believe.
Since mothering is no longer revered or understood to be something a woman would want to do, let alone should do, women are surprised to discover how heart-wrenching it is to leave their babies and return to work. They’re surprised to discover that work isn’t nearly as satisfying as they were led to believe.

This same sense of unease is felt by single women who can’t find a man with whom to settle down. Careers aren’t fulfilling at all, it turns out, if you wind up in bed at night alone.

Too many women map out their lives with work at the center and eventually wish they hadn’t. Sadly, my inbox is loaded with emails from women who tell me they wished someone had told them this sooner.

So, here I am saying it as loudly as I can. Women have been lied to for years, and that’s why they’re so unhappy. There is only one solution. Flip your priorities—put love and family, not work, at the center—and you will win in the game of life. That’s what I did, and it made all the difference.

 






morita

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im now sitting and waiting for the excuses, why its feminisms/womens fault, there is r*pe porn
They don't give a shit that the porn that they watch is nonconsensual and that the whole industry is based on exploitation.
I heard a woman says she nearly got raped at a party once at a nightclub and instead of helping her, the guys all stood there and took out their phones and started filming the scene. Thankfully she got saved by another woman, but that's how r*pe videos end up on the internet. It's despicable.
 






Last edited:

Linsky

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Im at work on my phone so i cant keep up with this thread like i can at home.

The solution is first for women to rerealise worth and value that exists within a traditional family oriented existence that was at one point and time more prevalant and recognized as important. Stop attributing such a way of life to feminist lies that it leads to misery and is a form of outdated oppression. Most women are happiest when they are expressing their innate biology to nurture in the form of wife and motherhood tasks, not wasting it as some corporate cog being alienated and mutated into a golemn. Thats the first step in giving value and worth to it...
Are you a woman? How would you even know this?
 






kerrichinchilla

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he's not. He's just another guy who thinks he can teach women about womanhood, your average.
look if us women could just accept hes a much better human being because he has a penis, then everyhitn will be ok and his fragile ego wont shatter from all the wimmin not accepting their roles
 






TempestOfTempo

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They don't give a shit that the porn that they watch is nonconsensual and that the whole industry is based on exploitation.
I heard a woman says she nearly got raped at a party once at a nightclub and instead of helping her, the guys all stood there and took out their phones and started filming the scene. Thankfully she got saved by another woman, but that's how r*pe videos end up on the internet. It's despicable.
r*pe porn isnt womens or feminists fault alone... lots of blame to go around. And by r*pe porn I mean pornography which depicts r*pe in it. Actual sexual assault on film is an entirely diferent ballgame.
 






TempestOfTempo

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Dirty animals, the lot of them.
And she was wearing a hijab too, proof that it has nothing to do with the way women dress. To all the people saying that r*pe victims were "asking for it".
Who the HELL ever said r*pe victims are "asking for it" here?!
 






muslimah

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Dirty animals, the lot of them.
And she was wearing a hijab too, proof that it has nothing to do with the way women dress. To all the people saying that r*pe victims were "asking for it".
Covering up is a protective factor, but not some invincibility shield, against r*pe. Just like there are things you can do to reduce your risk of cancer but those things aren't a guarantee that you will never get cancer. It's extremely irresponsible to act like whenever safety tips are brought up that we're taking any and all responsibility off of men for r*pe. And feminists love to say "just teach men not to r*pe!; yeah that's what most people are doing, but we live in the real world and r*pe happens regardless of how much we speak against it because psychopaths and the like exist.
Imagine any other crime, like murder or robbery, being treated this way.
"Hey man don't wear that expensive watch to that high-crime rate area you're going. You could get robbed."
"Stop victim blaming! Go tell those criminals not to rob me."
 






kerrichinchilla

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Covering up is a protective factor, but not some invincibility shield, against r*pe. Just like there are things you can do to reduce your risk of cancer but those things aren't a guarantee that you will never get cancer. It's extremely irresponsible to act like whenever safety tips are brought up that we're taking any and all responsibility off of men for r*pe. And feminists love to say "just teach men not to r*pe!; yeah that's what most people are doing, but we live in the real world and r*pe happens regardless of how much we speak against it because psychopaths and the like exist.
Imagine any other crime, like murder or robbery, being treated this way.
"Hey man don't wear that expensive watch to that high-crime rate area you're going. You could get robbed."
"Stop victim blaming! Go tell those criminals not to rob me."

But society isn't teaching men not to tape they are teaching women not to get raped.

My telling women and girls that they should take precautions not to get raped, what's really being said is make sure another woman gets raped not you.

If we were really teaching boys and men not to r*pe, then we would not see, society and the media making excuses for rapists, or defending rapists "good character", the fact is when r*pe happens the victim is asked what SHE did wrong while excuses are made for the rapist.

What clothes did you wear
What did you drink
How did you look at him
Did you fight back
Did you say no and if you did when, how and was it before sex
Are you sure you don't just regret saying yes

r*pe is the only crime where the victim is interrogated more than the perpetrators. r*pe is the only crime where the victim is seen as guilty until proven innocent.
 






muslimah

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But society isn't teaching men not to tape they are teaching women not to get raped.

My telling women and girls that they should take precautions not to get raped, what's really being said is make sure another woman gets raped not you.

If we were really teaching boys and men not to r*pe, then we would not see, society and the media making excuses for rapists, or defending rapists "good character", the fact is when r*pe happens the victim is asked what SHE did wrong while excuses are made for the rapist.

What clothes did you wear
What did you drink
How did you look at him
Did you fight back
Did you say no and if you did when, how and was it before sex
Are you sure you don't just regret saying yes

r*pe is the only crime where the victim is interrogated more than the perpetrators. r*pe is the only crime where the victim is seen as guilty until proven innocent.
I'd like to change some key words here:

"But society isn't teaching abductors not to kidnap they are teaching children not to get kidnapped.

My telling boys and girls that they should take precautions not to get abducted, what's really being said is make sure another kid gets abducted not you."

See how silly this is?

And again, telling women to take precautions is not the same as this:
"If we were really teaching boys and men not to r*pe, then we would not see, society and the media making excuses for rapists, or defending rapists "good character", the fact is when r*pe happens the victim is asked what SHE did wrong while excuses are made for the rapist."
Teaching women how to stay safe and holding rapists accountable for their crimes are not mutually exclusive.

Also about this part:

"What clothes did you wear
What did you drink
How did you look at him
Did you fight back
Did you say no and if you did when, how and was it before sex
Are you sure you don't just regret saying yes"

The last three questions especially make sense to ask when figuring out if it was r*pe. False accusations do happen and it's also important to get a full picture of the story. If a woman doesn't say no, doesn't fight back, or otherwise doesn't make it clear that she's not okay with what's happening and is not having something that's preventing her from doing so (ie. fear of physical harm, being drugged, etc.) then how can you call that r*pe? She's a willing participant. Imagine any other situation where someone just lets something happen and then claims later they were forced into it. And if she just regrets saying yes then that's just ridiculous of course that isn't r*pe.

And this part:
"r*pe is the only crime where the victim is interrogated more than the perpetrators. r*pe is the only crime where the victim is seen as guilty until proven innocent."
In crime cases the claimant and the defendant are interrogated. The base assumption is that the defendant didn't r*pe the victim unless proven otherwise. Just like in all crimes.

If someone is being charged for consuming an illegal substance, and what happened was someone fed them the substance, and they willingly received the substance and they never did anything to imply that they were not willingly accepting this substance, and later they want to claim that they were forced to have this substance because they never explicitly used the word "yes" then everyone would see that as ridiculous.
 






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TempestOfTempo

Superstar
Joined
Jan 29, 2018
Messages
5,566
First off, "most of society" is a completely conveient, but dishonest and untrue "fact"... but that wasn't what I asked and you know it. i was responding to a member who was remarking about commentary on this site. At least that is how they worded their post...
 






QDC753

Newbie
Joined
Jul 14, 2020
Messages
8
hon best not to quote from a bible website to condemn feminism, after all the bible isn't exactly pro woman, from r*pe, murder, torture, forced marriage, selling your daughter to her rapist and slavery. The bible is not one to follow if women want rights or to live

And believe me im incredibly happy with feminism,

feminism has allowed me to have

- The freedom NOT to have children
-Im just about to pay off my loan for the car i own and drive, a loan, and car i would not be able to have if feminism did not exist
- I have a masters degree, a bachelors degree and other qualifications which i would not have if not for feminism
- I have a career i love, again something feminism fought for
- I recently voted in my local and general elections, a right given to me by feminism
- I friends and family have all had successful healthy births they wanted, because feminism fought for maternity rights, they then had maternity leave with pay, thanks to feminism
- I have a house, again thanks to feminism
- I can go to my local GP and get free contraceptives because feminism fought for women to have reproductive rights, no more breeding until you die or your body cant anymore
- My husband cant legally r*pe me
- My husband and father cant just throw me in an asylum when im of no use
- My partner cant beat me with a stick no bogger than his thumb if i 'step out of line'.
- I family cannot cut off my genitalia, it is illegal.
- I can wear what i want, when i want. I can wear as little and as much as i want and i wont be stoned to death, beaten or imprisoned
- My husband cant sell me, neither can my father.
- I can play any sport i want, when i want. I can even compete if im good enough.
- I have my own bank account, something i did not have before feminism
- I can ride a bicyle ( yes that was illegal in America and the UK, and still is in countries like Iran)
- I i can post a letter ( again illegal in the UK and American, because men with fragile egos were worried women would think to much)

so yeah im super happy, i love feminism because its given me rights and freedoms that silly little men with fragile ego dont want me to have, due to their need to be in charge and subjugate people to feed

I actually loved everything written and appreciated the biblical references. I am a woman and have always felt judged by my choices because they don’t line up with traditional feminist beliefs. I think the main issue is that so called “feminists” are offended or threatened by women who prefer the more traditional roles of men and women. I don’t like the double standard of being judged for wanting to be a stay at home wife and mother. I’m just as worthy as women who work and take on more traditionally masculine roles, yet I’ve only ever been shamed for my traditional choices. I also think your generalized religious assumptions are unfair; you are using examples from a small extreme sect of religion to try to make a sweeping generalization about the entire practice which isn’t fair.
 






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